What to do if you hate college

What if you hate college?

What happens if you get to college and find yourself struggling?

What if college just isn’t what you thought it would be?

What should you do if you hate college?

Everyone acts like once you get into college, the hard part is over. It seems like everything you hear is about how great college is going to be. “The best four years of my life.” “All my best friends are from college.” “I could have stayed at college forever.”

So, okay, you’re finally at college—you made it. After a summer of anticipation, you moved in, you met your roommate, you got to know everyone on your floor, and you started classes. 

Now that the initial rush has worn off, you’ve started to feel a bit homesick, overwhelmed by your courses, unsure about your new friend group, and indifferent to what was once your dream school. 

All your friends from home seem to be living their best lives. Only you seem miserable at college. 

All you can think is: 

I hate college. 

I really hate college. 

I hate college so much. 

Why do I hate college?

I hate college; what should I do?

What should you do when you hate college?

First of all, you’re not alone. It is normal to dislike college or hate college. Maybe your friends and family aren’t talking about it, but lots of students dislike their college experience. At one point or another, many students hate college life. 

Despite the hype, college can be one of the most difficult times in a person’s life. 

This doesn’t mean you’re not smart or not cut out for college. It doesn’t necessarily mean you chose the wrong college. And it doesn’t mean you’re going to be miserable until graduation. 

This post discusses different reasons you might be unhappy at college and common college problems, plus strategies and resources for what to do when you hate college. 

Reasons students hate college

Why you hate college and what to do about it

I hate college because I don’t have friends

You might feel like everyone—except you—has made loads of new friends and absolutely loves their roommate. 

If you had a great friend group in high school, you may have underestimated how hard it can be to make close friends in college (especially if you have mostly online classes).

Maybe you just don’t click with your roommate and you haven’t connected with anyone else in your dorm. It’s easy to find yourself without a close friend to hang out with. 

What to do if you haven’t made friends at college

If you feel isolated at college and are having a hard time making friends, there are loads of extracurricular activities you can do. 

Join a club 

There is a club for every interest at college. Whether you want to be the Rory Gilmore of your school paper or advocate for environmental justice, there is a club for you on your campus.

And if there isn’t—start one! Joining a club will give you something positive to focus on and put you in a position to meet new people with whom you have at least one thing in common. 

Schools usually do a club fair early in the fall semester where all the school clubs share information and try to recruit new members. If you missed the club fair, the Campus Life or Student Life office (or the college website or app) will have a list of all the clubs and their contacts. 

Take an activity-based course

Have you always wanted to learn how to play tennis or ice skate? Now’s time to take a fun activity “class.” Some colleges offer these as eight-week one-credit courses, and others offer them through the recreational center.

Either way, sign up for something interesting that you’ve always wanted to do. Make it your class “assignment” to talk to someone at every lesson. It’s a lot easier to meet friends in an active class than it is when you’re sitting in lecture halls.

Do things with your dormmates

Residential life wants you to bond with your dormmates, so show up at those game nights and cookie giveaways. 

You don’t really have to go out of your way to connect with the people in your dorm, since you walk by them every day. Making friends with people in your dorm is a convenient way to meet friends, and it’s the first step in making a network of campus-wide friends. 

So see if anyone wants to go to the dining hall or the library with you, or just see whose door is open and go in and hang out. 

Strike up a conversation

Sometimes to have a friend, you have to be a friend. Instead of waiting for others to befriend you, reach out to them. 

Just start talking to the person you’re sitting next to in class. Ask them about themselves, what they think of the class, and if they understood the last lecture. Work up to asking them to grab a coffee with you or work on a group project together. They might also be looking for a new friend.

 

Volunteer

Volunteering is a fantastic way to meet people. Just find a cause that’s important to you. 

Start at your school’s Community Service Center and see what volunteer opportunities are out there. You can do one-day service projects, which can be great for meeting people if you are working in big groups with other students from your college. Or you can commit to on-going volunteering, in which case you’ll probably be working in a smaller group.

  

Consider a religious group

If you participated in a religious community back home, or you want to explore your faith, see what opportunities are sponsored by religious campus groups. Many college-based faith organizations hold social gatherings with meals and discussions, and all are welcome. 

Resources

Your campus has a wealth of resources to help you connect to other students and feel less lonely. Check out:

• Office of Campus Life
• Office of Student Life
• Office of Residential Life
• Community Service Center
• Chaplain’s Office
• The campus gym/rec center

I hate college because I miss my friends

Maybe you’re hating college because you miss your old friends. You spent four years of high school—maybe longer—with your high school friends. Of course you miss them. These are the people who’ve had your back forever. You might feel a little lost since this year “back to school” doesn’t mean with them. 

What to do when you miss your old friends at college

Invite your friends to visit you

Being with people who know you and have a history with you is so comforting, so make plans to visit. If your friends visit you, you’ll get to show off your college and introduce them to your new friends. Your friends might help you see your university in a different light. 

Go visit your friends

If you go visit your friends, you’ll get a change of scenery and get to meet their new friends. Getting out of your routine and having fun will make you feel better.

Besides, after spending a few days with your old friends, you might realize they have just as many misgivings about their college as you do about yours. 

Resources

• Basic technology: texts, Snaps, Facetime, etc.
• Google Flights to track and compare flight prices. 

I hate college because I miss my family

You may have been sad for them to leave when they dropped you off, or maybe you could not wait for them to say goodbye and drive away. But now that they’re back home and you’re away at college, you realize you actually kind of miss them. 

What to do when you’re at college and you miss your family

Give them a call

Give your parents, siblings, or other family members a call or connect over Facetime or Zoom. Catch up with a long chat. You can tell them the fun and exciting parts of college, as well as the fact that you’re feeling lonely and homesick. 

Many students find that a weekly scheduled call is a good idea. That way, catching up doesn’t get put off for too long. Everyone knows when to expect it. You can always talk more, but knowing you have a phone call scheduled can help everyone adjust to the distance. 

Go home for a visit

If you can go home for a quick weekend trip or fall break, go for it. This is especially helpful your first year of college, when you’re still adjusting.

Yeah, you have to be back at school on Monday, but having a few days at home with the people who love you most, your pet, and your favorite homemade foods will make you feel so much better. 

Give yourself some time

It takes a while to find your groove at college. Leaving behind the people you’ve lived with for years can be unsettling. Be patient with yourself as you adjust and deal with being homesick. 

By the time Parents Weekend rolls around, you might be feeling a lot more comfortable at college.

Resources

• Basic technology: texts, Snaps, Facetime, Zoom, etc.
• Google Flights to track and compare flight prices. 

I hate college because I don’t like my classes

Even though you studied hard in high school to prepare for college, and you were excited to pick your classes, that doesn’t mean you’ll actually like your courses once they start. 

If you did well (or well-enough) in high school, you might be surprised by how different college classes are. Yes, they’re harder—but the courses also cover a lot more material and students have to work more independently than they did in high school.

Between the papers you have to write, the books you’ve been assigned to read, complicated team projects, and labs that take up entire afternoons, it’s so much to manage. You may have to create different study habits for college.

There are usually two reasons college students hate their classes. First, they’re too boring. Second, they’re too hard. 

What to do if your college classes are boring

Is it the material or the professor’s style that’s boring you? Either way, you’ll just have to get through it for this semester. 

If it’s the material, try to find a more engaging class for next semester. For required core classes or general education requirements, look for topics that are more interesting to you. 

If it’s the professor’s style, sleuth out better professors next semester. 

What to do if your college classes are too hard

First, get help with your hard classes right away. Admitting that you are struggling and seeking help is your best chance at passing the class. 

Go to your professor for help. Figure out why you aren’t understanding the material. 

If the problem is with your professor’s delivery, then go to your campus tutoring office. Usually colleges offer a variety of tutoring services, which could include:

• Group study sessions, led by a TA or undergraduate assistant who has taken the course before
• One-on-one tutoring 
• Sessions on study skills and how to manage learning disabilities in college. 

In the future, be sure to look at Rate My Professors and ask your friends for recommendations. If you can’t get information that way, ask in your college’s student Facebook group—or ask a parent to ask in the parent Facebook group!

Resources

• Professor’s or TA’s office hours
• Campus tutoring office
• Rate My Professors
• College Facebook student group or parent group
• Friends and others in your major
• Final Exam Calculator to determine what grade you need on your final exam

I hate college because I hate my major

Sometimes, students hate their major classes because they have some especially difficult classes to get through. Organic chemistry, anyone? So it’s a particular class, not the whole major that’s the problem. 

Sometimes, though, it is the major. You may find that the reality of studying for a certain career isn’t at all what you thought it would be. It is extremely common for college students to change their majors, even multiple times. 

What to do when you hate your major

If your college required you to declare a major your freshman year, you can change your major. 

If your family is pressuring you to choose a certain major, and that pathway is not a good fit for you, now is the time to speak up. Discuss your choice with them, and remember that you will be the one who lives with the consequences of the decision. 

Talk to your family

Be honest with your parents, family, and friends. Let them know that you’re not happy and you’re struggling with adjusting to college. Tell them you think you picked the wrong major.

Chances are, they’ve already guessed. 

Just talking about how you’re feeling might help you feel better. Getting a little sympathy could do wonders for your well-being. Your parents might even tell you stories about times when they struggled and hated their situation. 

Talk to your advisor

For some majors, it’s no big deal to change your major. On the other hand, some majors require a sequential set of courses taken over four years, so those are a little more complicated. Get advice from an advisor or program chair before making the final choice.

Resources

• Your academic advisor
• Your program chair
• Your family

I hate college because I’m stressed about money

College is expensive. Unless you are fortunate enough to have received a rare full-ride scholarship, you’ll either be paying a lot of money for college or borrowing a lot of money to pay for college. 

For most families, paying for college is a huge challenge. Often families pay for college through a combination of saving, cash-flowing college expenses, and taking student loans. 

Many students work during the summers and the school year to pay for part or all of their college education. According to the National Center for Educational Statistics, in 2020, 40 percent of full-time undergraduate students were employed, and that same year, 74 percent of part-time undergraduate students worked. Of students who worked, most worked 20 or more hours a week. 

Having to work a job (or two or three), on top of going to class and doing all your coursework, is incredibly stressful. Working part-time or full-time hours as a student cuts into the time you’d rather be spending with friends and having the kinds of impromptu social interactions that you can really only find on a college campus. 

If you’re worried about finding a career path that will allow you to pay off your student debt (especially if its your senior year and you’re about to graduate), then you might be wondering if higher education is worth the cost and stress.

What to do if you hate college because of financial stress

Seek extra financial support

If your (or your family’s) financial circumstances have changed, ask the office of financial aid if they can reevaluate your aid options. Find out if there are university scholarships you could apply for to help pay for school this year or next year. 

Ask about departmental scholarships and apply for them. Believe it or not, departmental scholarships often go unawarded because no one applies for them.

Find out if there are emergency scholarships or a university food bank that could give you some extra support. 

Find the Right college job

You could look for a job that allows you maximum flexibility and gives you the best pay. This might mean taking an off-campus job, because student worker wages are not usually very high. 

On the other hand, you might want to find an on-campus job that has lots of downtime for studying. The classic example is working at a library reference desk. There might be some interruptions, but you’ll have a chance to study on the job. 

If the cost of the college you chose is much more expensive than you expected it to be or you’re getting less financial aid (from the school or from your family) than you anticipated, you might want to consider transferring to a more affordable school. You may have to weigh whether the stress of trying to find a less costly university would be possible or worth it for you. 

Resources

• Office of Financial Aid
• Your academic department
• College support services
• University food pantry

I hate college because I chose the wrong college

Maybe you’re thinking “I hate my college,” not “I hate college.”

Just because you got into your dream college doesn’t mean it will be as great as you anticipated. Sometimes once you actually experience something, you realize it wasn’t quite what you expected it to be. 

Perhaps the enthusiastic guide on your college tour glossed over some of the less than idea aspects of your school. Maybe you’re realizing that the image you had of life on campus doesn’t quite live up to your expectations, and college isn’t as fun as it appears in the movies and on TV. 

What to do when you hate your college 

Focus on the good things about your college

Remember why you chose your school in the first place. Maybe you don’t like your dorm room, but you love your low room and board fees. Maybe it’s the climate that’s bringing you down, but you still like how friendly everyone is. 

Focus on the good points of your university and remember why you wanted to go there in the first place. 

If you feel like the bad aspects of the school overwhelm the good, then you might need to look more deeply at why you’re unhappy. 

Consider transferring to another college

If you just don’t feel like your school is the right place for you, maybe you want to transfer. Many people recommend that students stay at a college for at least a full year to really give it a try. Others say that a semester is the minimum amount of time to give it a try. 

Know that if you transfer mid-semester, you will lose all the money you’ve paid for tuition, room, and board, with no credits to show for it. If you transfer to a new school, find out what scholarships you’ll receive and make sure you can afford it before you commit to the switch. 

Get a change of scenery

Also consider doing something like studying abroad for a year or National Student Exchange https://www.nse.org to study at a different campus in North America. Sometimes a change of scenery is just what you need. 

Resources

• Academic advisor
• Study abroad office
• National Student Exchange

Everything about college is harder than I thought it would be

The transition to college can be really hard. Not everything will work out as smoothly as you had expected. 

A lot of students have studied hard and tried to get good grades, only to end up with poor grades and a low gpa, despite their best efforts.

Trying to keep up with all your classes, make new friends, have a social life, and handle your new independence can be overwhelming.

Lots of students find that their first semester of college is about surviving, not thriving. Many students experience anxiety and depression, maybe for the first time, or maybe more intensely than they have before. You may need to find new ways to manage stress and anxiety in college.

What to do when everything about college feels hard

First, just give yourself a break. Give yourself permission to admit that adjusting to college has been a hard transition and you’re feeling a little overwhelmed. 

Literally take a break. Set aside some time to just relax. Either do something with friends or by yourself, whatever would help you feel refreshed. 

Then, try to pinpoint what is bothering you the most. Is it difficult course material? Not knowing how to study when your grade depends on only two tests? Not having anyone to eat with at the cafeteria? Feeling really homesick?

List all the things that feel overwhelming, and try to tackle each problem one by one. 

If it feels like you have too much to do:

Look at your schedule and see how you can manage your time better. Figure out how to balance your classes, socializing, clubs and volunteering, and downtime. 

If you are struggling with difficult classes:

Get help from your professor or a tutor right away. 

Consider taking fewer hard classes (or just fewer classes) next semester. 

If your mental health is faltering:

Talk to friends and family about your anxieties and struggles. Your friends at college are going through similar challenges and can probably relate very well to how you’re feeling. 

Try some techniques, like breath work, yoga, and more, that can help you manage your anxiety, panic attacks, and stress.

Talk to your advisor or a dean. Let them know how you’re doing and ask for support. 

Talk to a therapist. Your college has counselors on campus or you can find someone off-campus through your health insurance. A professional can offer insight into your mental health issues and guide you to find solutions to manage your stress and anxiety. 

In a crisis, get help from the Crisis Lifeline just by calling 988.

If you feel like you’re wasting your time in college:

Without a clear career goal in mind, you might feel like college is a waste of time and money. 

The fact is, there are many paths to success. Not all of them involve college. 

You don’t need a college degree to have a great job and make a good salary. However, for many jobs, having a bachelor’s degree is the first step towards a professional career. 

If you’re considering dropping out of college because you feel like college is a waste of time and you don’t know what you want to do with your life, first you should think about what you actually do want to do with your life and how you’ll get there.

You should talk with someone to help you figure this out. Ask your family, a therapist, an advisor, or a mentor for perspective and guidance. 

Resources

• Tutoring services
• Professor or TA                                                     
• A good planner
• Talk to your friends and family 
• Campus counseling service
• Off-campus therapist
• 988 Crisis Lifeline

When do students Hate college?

Honestly, the majority of college students hate college at some point. Feelings of overwhelm, zero motivation, depression, and frustration can happen at any point during your college years.

Freshman year, a lot of people find that college is a bigger adjustment than they expected. College classes are harder and it’s more difficult to manage their time than they thought it would be.

Sophomore year, many students experience the sophomore slump. The excitement of freshman year is over, but the tough classes still remain!

Junior year, many students are tired of their college campus and everyone on it. That’s why going to study abroad in a foreign land is so popular junior year.

College seniors sometimes hate college because they’re ready to be in the real world. And sometimes they hate college because they’re burnt out and just trying to make it to graduation.

If you hate college, know that you’re not alone! Most college students do at some point!

Final thoughts on “I hate college”

Let’s face it, one fact of adulthood is that you will not be happy all the time. Sometimes things don’t go your way. Sometimes you have to put in more work than you expected. Sometimes life is hard. 

This doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong or that things won’t get better. 

College isn’t necessarily “the best years of your life.” Your life at college won’t look like the idealized, romanticized version that shows up on movies and social media feeds.

The reality is that your college years will have a lot of highs and lows. You’ll experience immense pressure and huge amounts of stress, as well as really fun social activities with your closest friends.

Remember that the ultimate point of college is to help you learn and grow as a person. You’ll also develop skills and have experiences that will help you begin your chosen career. Keep your eyes on the prize. Even if your college experience isn’t easy or always fun, it’s still valuable. 

Colleges have tons of resources in place to help you succeed, but it’s up to you to seek them out. Push yourself out of your comfort zone to try new things and meet new people. Remember that things are almost always harder at the beginning. You can do hard things!